The pandemic just aged up our kids about 5 years. Back in March 2020, when home isolation and social distancing began, they seemed like kids. Now, three months later, they seem like teenagers who are about to become adults.
What happened?
For the first time in their lives my kids (age 12 and 15) started having to manage their own schedules and affairs, including schoolwork, eating, socializing, exercise, music practice, and playtime.
The astonishing part is that they took to it naturally.
Our kids are always surprising us with their sudden jumps in ability and maturity. But mostly they surprise us because we underestimate them.
Their sudden developmental leaps are like Eldredge and Gould’s concept of punctuated equilibrium, where nothing seems to happen for eons and then suddenly everything changes in a hurry. That’s kids.
At the dinner table we joke about “lifeskilz,” which we misspell with a flair, and speak with an extra accented “Z” at the end. But I sometimes wonder if these lifeskills we joke about are even more important than their actual schoolwork. Some of the ones I’m about to list are as old as humankind, and some are products of our modern age. But together, they form a framework for getting along in the world with poise and aplomb.
I’m so proud of my kids, and I know they’re going to pick up what they need, mostly without my help. But just for the record, here are the top skills I’d love my kids to take with them when they do ultimately leave our home and step out into the world.
Life Skilz
- Be kind, empathetic and generous
- Be a better listener than a talker
- Spend less than you earn and avoid borrowing money
- Eat well and incorporate daily movement and exercise
- Keep your pollution and energy footprint in check
- Consider both the source, and the eventual destination for each newly-manufactured item you acquire*
- Read lots of books and take breaks from technology
- Buy good quality and make it last, or buy used if practical
- Be reticent and slow to judge or criticize
- Get sleep
*I learned this from Cradle to Cradle by Michael Braungart and William McDonough
